To the optimist, the glass is half full. To the pessimist, the glass is half empty. To the engineer, the glass is twice as big as it needs to be.
A biologist, a chemist, and a statistician are out hunting. The biologist shoots at a deer and misses 5ft to the left, the chemist takes a shot and misses 5ft to the right, the statistician yells “We got ‘em!”
Jim was in a bad mood, and anyone who got in is way was going to regret it. Jim walked into his favorite restaurant and plopped himself down on a chair. “Get me a steak well done with mashed potatoes. ” Three minutes later when his order came, Jim screamed “DIDN’T YOU HEAR ME SAY WELL DONE?!” “Why thank you sir” the waitress smiled, ”that was the first compliment I got all day!”
People can use compliments, they don’t take much to give. I am going to give one away today.
After watching the near pandemonium and long lines appearing for the lottery it hit me. People seemed in great spirits to wait in long lines for a lottery ticket. OK, here we go. Make the only place you can buy a lottery ticket the DMV. BAM, problem solved. Happy people waiting for their winning lottery ticket and vehicle registration at the same time!